I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
