i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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