D3 body, D1 cock
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
