Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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