after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
