She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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