Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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