She said her name was "party"
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
