Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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