I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
