just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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