Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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