i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Your cock deserves a montage
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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