So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Watching her eat just hurts me
whose parrot is this?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
