I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
