I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
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