Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
