are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
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Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
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I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
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