Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I'd cum for enchiladas.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
