i just google imaged poop.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Oh god it's open bar.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
