Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
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noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I think I sprained my soul last night
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
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it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
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