I hate your face
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
organizing the empties. That sober.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
