His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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