Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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