You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
