Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He's a Shit stain on my heart
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
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