Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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