This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
