I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I won't apologize to a one balled man
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize