How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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