Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize