I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
