Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
