Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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