my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
