Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize