i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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