I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
