There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
