super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Congratulations! We have a period
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