And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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