You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
