too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
So many bounce houses so little time
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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