I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize