Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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