What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I supernannyed him into submission
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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