I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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