i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
