dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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