the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
