Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
