Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Randomize
